Neo Faucet Coffee
From the moment I began drinking coffee in Austin, TX, I was suspicious. This stuff tasted "off", but not as bad as instant coffee. My first cup came from the continental breakfast room at the (not-so-) Super 8. You push a button, the machine makes a pumping sound, and hot coffee flows into your cup. No pot, no grounds. If you watch closely at the end of the stream, you might see a brown viscous swirl. This is coffee's equivalent to the soda fountain.
I was comfortable with the idea, confined as it was to cheap motels. Then, jones-ing for caffeine, I stopped into a Fudruckers. They share a parking lot with my new digs, and I did not want to sprint across highway 35 to find a cup. No, they can't sell me brewed coffee, because their machine is not working. No, they can't sell me a pound of ground coffee, because they use a concentrated liquid.
Que?
Did I fall asleep for twenty years, to discover that fresh brewed coffee was extinct? Or am I just a spoiled Seattle java junkie? My people, from Illinois, drink Folgers crystals, or, as I call it, "faucet coffee." I used to try and keep some instant around, in case I ran out. It did not work. My stomach rejects faucet coffee, responding with an all-morning acid bite. I've tried haranguing, subsidizing with gifts (coffeemakers! pounds of ground!), to no avail.
Imagine my surprise when a famous and sophisticated city such as Austin seemed to have adopted the latest version of faucet coffee! Could it be that others are adopting this technology? Achh! A Google search produces several brands of coffee concentrate machines! I'd sooner switch to a caffeine patch.
Restaurateurs, be apprised: here is what happens to those who tamper with my coffee: Chris Farley is served instant coffee.
posted by Monte Hayward @ 11:54 AM
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7 Comments:
Monte, quit complaining about the coffee and get down to the business at hand! You're not in Seattle anymore w/ the rest of the addicts trying to forget about the rain. And another thing, we have graduated to Folgers+, our Springfield culture is more sophisticated than you remember- it's gourmet coffee everywhere you turn now. So quite whining and start trying to fit in! Walk around the university, stop in a real coffee shop, go check out some live music, hit a bike trail or go hiking! I would imagine the people are pretty cool and laid back, maybe a little artsy too. Kind of like Tucson on steroids. My only concern about Austin is what the job market is really like since it's been flooded w/ people moving there. But I was speaking to a friend from Rochester recently and he said he would have never come back home after a visit there if he didn't have obligations in this area. So come on, Monte, keep moving forward and tell us about your exploits!
As a matter of fact, I got an excellent haircut and mocha downtown today. Connected with a mortgage broker that had some good news for me. Also paid off the thugs at the IL DMV. So, I should have a clean driving record ... in three to five days. Now, any organization that needs $75 and a business week to update a database record -- that's who's in trouble.
See that, Monte?- http://www.world-guides.com/images/austin/austin_tx_state_museum3.jpg Get used to that star, longhorns, and bbq. My favorite thing about the southwest and TX is the Tex-Mex. I suggest learning how to make your own salsa and guacamole. Also, drop the Montini (http://amateur-mixologist.blogspot.com) for beer, it goes better w/ spicy food.
http://www.austinexplorer.com/hiking/ Hike trails.
Monte, after looking at the landscape photos of the hiking areas around Austin, I'm pretty disappointed. I thought it was greener and more beautiful there. Another downside is the weather from May to Nov., 5 months out of the year it's going to be hot and humid as hell. I took Tucson's weather and beauty for granted when I was living there. If I were you I wouldn't blow my wad on a condo/house in Austin unless I had a job lined up that I was going to be happy w/. I suggest looking at more cities, perhaps Portland, Tucson, maybe even Hawaii if you think you could get a decent job there. It's a tough road to happiness but you have freedom and independence to do anything you desire. Austin isn't the end of the road and I don't think it lives up to its hype.
What about the bay area? I know it's expensive but you get what you pay for.
Hotel Congress is waiting for you. http://www.hotelcongress.com I've stayed there a couple times coming from IL. It was also a great spot for nitelife and dining in the city. Recently, Rachael Ray brought her show into the Cup Cafe. When I lived in Tucson, from 89-93 I heard about Austin and the cultures were often compared, like the music scene, the arts, etc.
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